10/28/2018

Another good week. Not as exhilarating without Vincent, but the affirmation of his presence stayed with me a long time. On Monday I stayed in bed with his arms around me, not willing to break the embrace and go to work. The night before we’d talked of him coming to meet me in Brooklyn for … More 10/28/2018

10/21/2018

Such a GREAT week! A grin on my face everywhere I go, and so much energy coursing through my body. I just feel exhilarated. Why? Well, Vincent is here. He arrived at 1am on Wednesday morning, and it is so nice to be together in the city where we fell in love. My job told … More 10/21/2018

10/14/2018

Today marks four months in NYC. It’s been awhile. And since I’m so busy, it’s harder to get to writing this. Except I’m always writing it in my head. This is my first weekend home (i.e., back in NYC) for three weeks. Last weekend I flew to Buffalo, NY to visit my father in Bradford, … More 10/14/2018

10/2/2018

Last Monday the sky was such a deep blue and the air held such promise, change was imminent. I had a professor who used to say there was a certain day in the Spring when everyone was beautiful. For me, that day is in the Fall. It almost felt certain. Routine has taken place. I … More 10/2/2018

9/23/2018

It is a week of we’ll see. A month of maybes. A summer of sometime. Every moment of hope keeps being swatted down. But still I rise. The Fifth Season lingers, disappearing for a day or two and then re-emerging in smells and pools of vomit. I swear there was a day where I saw … More 9/23/2018

9/13/2018

The fifth season finally ended. For New Yorkers, there are five seasons: Fall, Winter, Spring, Summer, and the Season of Bad Smells and Tempers. It is usually shorter than the rest, although I find myself imagining a post-apocalyptic Fifth Season that is constant (no relation to the excellent book of the same name). After my … More 9/13/2018

9/5/2018

Not gonna lie. It’s been tough lately. Wondering “what’s wrong with me?” Why is this so hard? Starting to forget to be kind. The ugly side of the city has started encroaching: A man yelling at someone on the subway, another man refusing to make space when asked. The smells. Angry people in mean phone … More 9/5/2018