Last Monday the sky was such a deep blue and the air held such promise, change was imminent. I had a professor who used to say there was a certain day in the Spring when everyone was beautiful. For me, that day is in the Fall. It almost felt certain. Routine has taken place. I … More 10/2/2018


It is a week of we’ll see. A month of maybes. A summer of sometime. Every moment of hope keeps being swatted down. But still I rise. The Fifth Season lingers, disappearing for a day or two and then re-emerging in smells and pools of vomit. I swear there was a day where I saw … More 9/23/2018


The fifth season finally ended. For New Yorkers, there are five seasons: Fall, Winter, Spring, Summer, and the Season of Bad Smells and Tempers. It is usually shorter than the rest, although I find myself imagining a post-apocalyptic Fifth Season that is constant (no relation to the excellent book of the same name). After my … More 9/13/2018


Not gonna lie. It’s been tough lately. Wondering “what’s wrong with me?” Why is this so hard? Starting to forget to be kind. The ugly side of the city has started encroaching: A man yelling at someone on the subway, another man refusing to make space when asked. The smells. Angry people in mean phone … More 9/5/2018


OMG, so much has happened. And nothing has happened. I am still working the tedious bankruptcy claim job, possibly for another week. I still haven’t received my check from the EA job I had for a week that is supposed to pay my September rent. For all their talk about efficiency, their payroll guy is … More 9/1/2018


Once again, I am without internet. It’s frustrating because it slows me down on the job hunt. I feel cut off from possibilities. Although I do have my phone, it’s harder to tweak up a resume and letter and send it out. In the meantime, I have been plugging away at this job. It’s okay, … More 8/16/2018


For Vincent’s last day we decided to ride the Staten Island ferry. I don’t think I’ve ever done that. We explored and poked around a bit. It was fun. And free. Over the weekend I’d sent several applications for writing jobs. One was for a documentary film company specializing in social justice issues. Giving voice … More 8/9/2011


Whew! Finally taking a break and just relaxing after the last two weeks of hustle bustle. Vincent is officially on vacation and we are enjoying being in New York City together with nothing to do and no kids to entertain. It is wonderful. Admittedly my angst didn’t resolve until I had the internet up and … More 8/6/2018

8/3/2018 (the move)

Not having internet is a bitch! Last Friday Anthony, Vincent and I moved to my new apartment with the help of the movers Vlad and Slobodan. They were pretty dour, at first, but I bought them water, and they cheered up. The first real smile coming when I gave them a tip. Vincent complained about … More 8/3/2018 (the move)


Another whole week gone, and so much to talk about. My good friend Anthony came with Vincent from Kalamazoo to help me move into the new apartment. I signed the lease on Tuesday and then rushed to get things done. To back up, I had made the application the Thursday before and then waited all … More 7/30/2018